Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Randomize
