Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
cat food counts as protein by the way
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
