He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Randomize
