ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
