I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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