i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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