Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
