he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I have post one night stand depression
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