Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
