Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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