PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
