All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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