Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
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