pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize