remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.