dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
