Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.

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(914): View more from New York

Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts

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(443): View more from Maryland

Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?

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(213): View more from California

Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.

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(940): View more from Texas

You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole

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(801): View more from Utah

What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

well ya only live once...

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?

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