THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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