Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize