I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
