grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
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