I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize