Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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