I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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