Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Duck Duck Cougar?
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Randomize