wakey wakey hands off snakey
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
