I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
