this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize
