i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
