Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize