The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Everclear isn't food dammit
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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