I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
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Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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