You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize