You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize