"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize