He kissed a someone with a penis
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
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I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
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COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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