he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
found the other keg... it's in the tree
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
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