if only i could text you this smell
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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