Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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