All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
