My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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