I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.