Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
