Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
This is classic penis vs brain.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
