i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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