White coat. Heels.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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