They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
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I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
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I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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