hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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