Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
