Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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